Subverting The Form

Once upon a time, there lived a beautiful princess called Brunettilocks. When she was just a little girl, she had been Goldilocks, and as she grew up, she changed her name frequently, being Blondilocks, Highlightilocks, Blackilocks & Burgundilocks. An evil witch, so jealous of the princess, cast a wicked spell upon her, and turned her hair to the shiniest silver. Luckily, her fairy godmother came to her aid, and every few weeks restored her hair to its former glory.

Brunettilocks, the beautiful princess, lived in the land of Sometime-Never, and spent hours gazing wistfully through her window into the dark woods beyond, wishing for her Prince Charming. Prince Charming sadly never seemed to arrive, so Brunettilocks decided to take matters into her own hands, and venture into the deep, dark woods. One day, whilst she played happily with a little band of squirrels and rabbits, she spied a cottage she had never seen before. Bravely, she approached, and knocked on the door. There was no answer, so she pushed the creaking door open to peek inside.

She explored the little cottage, exclaiming joyfully at the treasures she found within. She ventured upstairs, and overcome by the excitement of her adventure, lay on the bed to sleep. She was rudely awakened by a loud shout. Sitting up in bed with a start, she was shocked to discover a great big bear, who told her his name was First Bear. She decided quickly that she loved him very much, and married him the next day. They lived happily for a short while, but then one day, First Bear came home from work looking very cross.

"Whose bed have you been sleeping in?" he growled, and Brunettilocks (who at this point was known as Copperilocks) sadly decided it was time to leave First Bear, and resume her search for Prince Charming. Some days later, she happened upon another cottage, very similar to the first. And here was another bear, almost the same as the first one! She was very worried that she would never find Prince Charming, and was tiring of the happy little games with the rabbits and the squirrels. So when Second Bear asked if she would marry him, she happily said that she would. They soon had a beautiful little baby bear, who Brunettilocks called Best Bear in All The Land, and she loved him very much.

Sadly, the day soon arrived when she had to leave Second Bear too, but Best Bear in All The Land lived some of the time with Brunettilocks, and some of the time with Second Bear, and he was a very happy bear indeed. Brunettilocks still dreamed of her Prince Charming, and would still gaze into the distant woods of Sometime-Never, wondering if he would ever appear. She decided that she would have one last search for him, and ventured into the woods again. She came upon a third little cottage, but this one was very different to the first. She peeked round the door, and spied a lovely steaming bowl of porridge on the table and sat down to taste it. Mmmm, it was delicious! But just as she put the second spoonful to her mouth, the door swung open, and there stood another bear, very different to the first two.

"Who is eating my porridge?" he asked, but not unkindly.

"It's just me, Brunettilocks", she replied. "It tastes delicious - does it have a special name?" she asked.

"Yes it does" he answered. "This is special friendship porridge"

And Brunettilocks and Third Bear sat down together to share the special friendship porridge. Soon she visited every day, and always enjoyed a bowl of special friendship porridge, but one day she asked if she could have something more.

"I'm sorry" said Third Bear. "But special friendship porridge is all I have".

"That's OK" she replied, and continued to visit every day. Some time later she asked again for more, but sadly the answer was still the same. Never mind, she thought, because the special friendship porridge is delicious, and I like it very much. She still visited Third Bear every day, and decided to ask one final time if there was anything else she could have. This time, Third Bear thought carefully and said:-

"I don't have quite what you want, Brunettilocks, because I think you would like to have some cake and eat it. But instead I can sometimes give you sugar and spice, and if you can be happy with that, then everything will be OK"

Brunettilocks thought very carefully. It had been very important to her to find Prince Charming, and truly she did want to have that delicious cake and eat it. But sugar and spice sounded very nice to have, so she told Third Bear that sugar and spice would be very nice indeed. She decided that she would visit him as often as she could, sometimes to have some special friendship porridge, and sometimes, if there was any, she would have some sugar and spice.

And if one day Prince Charming happened to come by, he would surely find her.

The End.

And the moral of this story, dear readers? That not every fairy story has a happy ending.

But sometimes, just sometimes, if you clap your hands and believe in fairies, it's not entirely a sad ending either.

Sometimes, just sometimes, it's the start of an adventure.